Member Article

Parents are from Venus, Teenagers are from Mars

Parents and teenagers are on different wavelengths about how ready they are for university life, a report from Unite Students reveals today.

While university prospects are giving themselves A grades for their life skills, skeptical parents are giving their children a C.

The new research of a thousand parents and a thousand teenagers found:

• Over half of the parents polled think that their child is able to cook a meal from scratch on their own, but over three-quarters of teenagers are confident they can.

• Over a third of parents think their children will not wash their bedsheets more than once a month, but the majority of teenagers say they will. And a quarter of parents did not even think their children can change their bedsheets on their own.

• Almost three quarters of the parents of university prospects polled think that it is likely that they will expect to lend money to their children before the end of the first term, but only a third of teenagers expect to borrow from their parents, whilst the of teenagers are confident they can manage their money.

Parents and teenagers also disagree about discussions they have had ahead of going to university.

Many parents polled claim to have offered advice about a range of sensitive issues: including sex, mental health, relationships, drugs and alcohol. 1 in 7 teenagers say they have not been given advice on any of these things.

In the month in which most students have received conditional offers, Unite Students is urging parents and teenagers to start having frank conversations now about getting ready to make the leap to university.

Unite Students Head of Student Services and Insight Jenny Shaw said:

A lot of parents worry their children will flunk the life skills test when they make the leap to university and live on their own. Every year we help fifty thousand students make this big move. It’s true many do get a bit of a shock to the system initially, but with a little planning, most quickly adapt and do well and we are always there to offer support and practical advice.

Our research also suggests some parents may be overly focusing on their off springs practical skills at the expense of having conversations about more tricky stuff, like sex, mental health, drugs and alcohol. Now is the time to have these honest chats, because it will be even harder after they have moved away.

Liz Fraser, parenting writer and broadcaster, has one daughter at university and another due to go this autumn.

Leaving home is one of the most exciting but challenging times, she said. I lived through this as a student twenty five years ago and I am now doing so again as a parent. It is really struck me how much the world has changed and how much more pressure students feel under socially and emotionally.

It has made me realize just what a complex time this is and how much support and advice they need. In the social-media obsessed, unpredictable world our children are moving into, it is important to give them the best chance at making this giant leap - and landing on their feet.

The good news is, based on research by Unite Students, their confidence in managing things like finances and household chores grows throughout their university life. For example, confidence in washing their own clothes notably increased in their first year to their third year.

This was posted in Bdaily's Members' News section by Unite Students .