Member Article

7 Top Tips on How to Tackle Difficult Conversations from Award Winning Communication and Conflict Expert

Nicole Posner, 57 from North West London is an Award Winning Communication and Conflict Expert, who supports business leaders to minimise conflict through effective communication, has created a guide on how to ‘have difficult leadership conversations’ in order to nurture a thriving and harmonious environment.

She is celebrating her best-selling author status as her book, ‘And Breathe…’, stormed the Amazon book charts, sitting alongside major players like Simon Sinek and Brené Brown, becoming a No.1 in 10 categories including; Business Skills, Business Consulting and HR & Personnel Management…

Guiding readers through techniques to breeze through tough conversations, Nicole has combined her mediation and communication skills with her study of Psychology to bring a range of strategies that can help all of us professionally and personally, in our challenging interactions.

Nicole realised through years of facilitating complex mediations, that many bosses had no idea how to navigate sensitive or tough conversations, often leading to an escalation of a small misunderstanding into a full blown crisis, broken relationships and costly emotional and financial damage.

Nicole said: “I became increasingly frustrated during mediation after mediation, that I was simply putting a sticky plaster over the issue, but not really touching what was at the core, because the business owners or bosses were essentially the root of the problem. Yet, they didn’t recognise this. They didn’t have the communication skills to deal with people problems, which made matters worse or their choice action was avoidance, which only escalated matters!”

She also observed the impact of overpowering leadership styles, something she herself experienced in her early 20’s, during her formative years working in a PR Agency where bullying and uncompassionate bosses were the norm and not the exception. Although she loved the glamourous world of PR and was a ‘grafter’, often working until midnight and over weekends; lack of respect or appreciation for her input by her managers, left her feeling demotivated and disengaged. This book is Nicole’s opportunity to ensure others don’t experience this, and she aims to raise awareness to today’s leaders that there is another way to still meet targets and deadlines without compromising the emotional wellbeing of those within the business.

The book is split into two parts; Conflict Prevention and Conflict Cure, shining the light on why problems manifest followed by guidance on how to address them.

With the release of ‘And Breathe’, Nicole is on a mission to educate but also to empower leaders and business owners to tackle conflict and people challenges more discerningly and confidently.

Nicole, who began her mediation career in 2016, previously studied Psychology for 6 years, following her fascination of people and their behaviours. Changing direction once her children were all grown up, she persued her passion in a bid to do her bit to minimise workplace conflict, ensuring businesses were thriving and happier places to be. She subsequently trained to become a coach, working with her clients to raise awareness of their communication style and the impact of it while guiding them through their difficult dialogues. She also delivers bespoke leadership workshops.

‘And Breathe : Prevent, Manage and Master Difficult Leadership Conversations in Business and Beyond!’ is available on Amazon.

7 Top Tips on How to Tackle Difficult Conversations

1.    Allow your curiosity to be an influence - Curiosity, when used with the right intention, is one of the most powerful tools for change without challenge, to deflect anger and encourage investment into ideas and process without employing strong-arm tactics.
   

2.    Understand that there is a time and a place - We are what we bring to the table. It’s vital to schedule the conversation when you have time for it. Don’t squeeze it into a conversation before a presentation when your focus will be somewhere else. Or when you are rushing from one meeting to another as your energy might be depleted!
   

3.    The importance of relationships – When you hit a roadblock or are faced with a tough conversation, it is so much easier to navigate if you share a good report and genuine connection - authentic relationships where honesty is appreciated and not resented. 
   

4.    The significance of recognition – Remember that your teams are your most valuable assets, so take the time to demonstrate that they are valued.
   

5.    The power of listening - I appreciate it is hard to sit quietly and listen, particularly if you don’t necessarily agree with what you are hearing or if your mind is full of a million distractions taking away focus. It takes courage, stamina and patience. 
   

6.    The value of values - They are the core reason relationships breakdown, personalities clash and conflicts manifest. 
   

7.    Always remember to lead with H.E.A.R.T - Humility, Empathy, Authenticity, Respect and Transparency… 
   

This was posted in Bdaily's Members' News section by Chocolate PR .